life, death, and everything in between
by but seriously
Summary: or, a fistful of drabbles and oneshots - some prompted, some not - revolving around the Original family. includes: elejah, klaroline, etc


Some of these are kinda old, dating back to like a year ago. I just wanted to put them all in one place.

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**1. ****magnolia**

The call from Katerina was suspicious and vague (and suspiciously vague), but he had to see for himself.

The paint from the foyer smells fresh and the marble from the grand staircase shine as bright as his own Italian shoes as he makes his way silently upstairs. Despite the smell of the new renovations still hanging in the air he can still sense it as he heads down the little used hallway: the smell of rain-splattered grass and magnolias. Just a hint of nutmeg.

She's sleeping, a hand he remembers to be soft resting under her cheek and he catalogues it in his mind hungrily, almost a century of not seeing her enough to make him want to shake her awake (but he doesn't). She looks delicate, like a little China doll with her golden hair spilling over her shoulders, and all he can do is stand by the doorway and stare.

What does one dream of, he muses, when they've been sleeping for ninety years?

Later, Elijah closes the door soundless behind him and leaves. The note he had been planning on leaving behind lies crumpled in his suit pocket.

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**2. count back anesthetize**

"We're here today to talk about your…" Elijah shuffles the sheaf of papers before him, "anger issues."

Klaus scowls and slumps even further down the leather sofa, his arms crossed tight over his chest. "I don't have bloody anger issues."

"Impulsive daggering, threatening people with aforementioned dagggering, and this morning you stole Kol's pillow and threw it out the window because he was snoring too loudly," he reads, his expression betraying nothing.

Once finished, Elijah looks at his brother pointedly. Klaus reveals a lethal fang.

Elijah then calls out to Rebekah to cancel all appointments for the next three weeks ("_What _appointments?" she asks, eyes narrowed. "What demented role play are you two doing this time?"), while Klaus all but sinks into the couch in his chagrin.

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**3. that's just that**

"Did anyone remember the di—"

"Oh, for God's sake Elijah," Rebekah mutters, eyes rolling heavenward, "it's a party. There is bound to be food. Stop worrying about the dip."

"Why are we even here?" is Klaus' long-suffering remark as they make their way up the stone pathway, the only light coming from the glowing pumpkin heads scattered across the lawn.

The three of them stand on Elena's front porch (Rebekah dressed as a mermaid, Klaus in his usual henley and beads ("I suppose your usual face is terrifying enough," Rebekah snarks") and Elijah in a suit.

Rebekah had rolled her eyes at _that_ and had even suggested that Elijah be one of the Secret Service, "You don't even have to make much of an effort!"

But Elijah had just blinked at her. "No. I'm a man in a suit."), and despite the air of power that usually hovers around their presence, it seems almost awkward. Especially when Kol comes crashing out of one of the windows, Damon yelling after him, "Trick or treat, motherfucker!"

Elena opens the door to let them in, head bobbing in exasperation. "Happy Halloween."

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**4. moneyball**

"You lying cheat!" Klaus growls, almost upending the board in his frustration at Kol managing to get both Boardwalk _and _Mayfair in barely two rounds.

Kol shrugs and shuffles his game money slowly, mockingly, much like the smile that is now on his face. "Not my fault you happen to be terrible at these things. I wonder how you even handled the crash of 1920."

While Klaus glowers and mutters murderously under his breath, Rebekah is busy arranging all her hotels with that same smirk on her face. "He didn't. We had Elijah look them over."

"The only time he made it seem like I was needed," Elijah says, with no trace of bitterness. If at all, he seems to be almost nostalgic.

The fondness in his voice silences Klaus' tirade, and he says: "Of course you were needed. Always and forever, brother."

"Just as I will always and forever beat all of you at this game," Kol says smugly, sweeping all of their property cards towards his already-big pile.

Rebekah, Elijah and Klaus take great pleasure in flipping the board in his face.

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**5. all those friendly people**

It's when thy're preparing dinner (or rather: Elijah prepares; Kol just sticks knives into the roast Elijah is marinating and laughs like it's a funny joke) that Kol says he's going to be starting school next Monday.

If Elijah's suspicious, he doesn't show it. There is no pause in his chopping of onions after Kol's announcement, and he asks wryly, "This doesn't have anything to do with your discovery of slingshots, does it?"

"I have no idea what you're talking about, brother," Kol says, the shine in his eyes reflecting nothing of the rubber bullets and Rebekah's schedule safely hidden in his backpack.

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**6. settle, settling**

"Stop it," Rebekah hisses, cornering Kol one morning. "Stop sitting with me at lunch, stop shooting things at me in Chemistry, stop _cheating off of me_ in Calculus—"

"Tecnically," Kol says, raising a finger, "I was_ about _to cheat on you, but then I saw you're every bit as hopeless as you were a century ago, so…" Rebekah seems to swell up in her anger, so he deploys a different tactic. "Besides, I never get to see you. Is it so wrong of me to want to?"

There's a pause, and Kol channels as much sincerity as he can muster into their staring contest. Finally, Rebekah sighs. "I've a sneaking suspicion you have fifth period PE too. Come on."

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**7. once upon a time, on the same side: high school au**

Klaus likes to draw her when she does cartwheels in the football field. She's a twirl of colour _(every_colour imaginable, right down to her shoelaces) and once she gets started it's like she won't ever stop.

Caroline stretches out her legs and looks around, taking in a breath she doesn't necessarily need, smiling. Always smiling—

(but never at him).

And then, as if sensing his presence, she squints her eyes in the bright sun to where he's sitting at the bleachers. But she won't be able to find him; he's already gone.

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**8. bumble and bumble: high school au**

"No," Rebekah announces, even before Klaus had time to open his mouth.

"What is your problem?" he mutters, setting down his tray. "For the last time, you look _fi_—"

"No, I do not look 'fine', _Nik_" Rebekah air-quotes. "You used up all my hair conditioner, and now my hair is frizzy. I'm having a bad hair day because of _you, _so no: you can't sit with me."

Klaus gives her a look which brought exasperation to a whole new level, and was about to express said exasperation, until Finn plopped down next to them. "What are you two nattering on about now?"

"Someone used up all my hair-conditioner this morning," Rebekah says, sending razor-sharp glances at Klaus.

"Oh, that would be me. I rather like the smell of it, don't you?" Finn asked, running a hand through to his hair that, only now, Klaus noticed to be extraordinarily shiny.

Klaus and Rebekah don't quite know what to say to that.

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**9. my waltz in her hands**

Their feet float over the dance floor and his hand rests low on the small of Elena's back and her fingers trace the skin on the back of his neck and all he can think about is how much he would like to press her against a wall, to break through the whisper of space between their bodies, to taste the wine on her lips.

They melt together against a backdrop of chamber music and hushed conversation, and Elijah banishes any thought of kissing her from his mind - instead, lets his eyes linger on her lips.

They are dancing, and for now (for _now_), that is enough.

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**10. princess of china**

Dan—eighteen, closet writer, with a shock of dark hair and even darker eyes—stands before the large double doors of his date's mansion. He takes in a deep breath, tugs on his collar absentmindedly (he hates ties. Rebekah is hot. Rebekah likes ties. You do the math).

He raises a hand to the gold-plated knocker, but the door seems to open of its own accord. His cautious 'hello' echoes through the dark foyer, and he fervently hopes none of her family members are home. He's heard a lot about the elusive brothers of Rebekah Mikaelson. He'd like to leave it at that.

"Rebekah?" he calls, and takes a step inside. The second the sole of his leather shoe touches down on the marble floor, a figure swoops - like, literally _swoops _- down on him, scaring the bejeesus out of him.

Aforementioned figure turns out to be another guy, about his height, lean and with a malicious quirk to his lips. He moves like a jungle cat stalking its prey. Slow. Careful. Lethal.

"We haven't officially met," he says breezily. "I'm Kol Mikaelson."

A voice, deeper and without the musical lilt in Kol's, says from down the hall: "Is Rebekah's date here, then?"

Dan's eyes dart from Kol's (narrowed) to the other brother's (coolly blank) as he walks down. He's carrying a silver platter of something, and he's in a suit pressed sharp enough to give you a paper cut or two.

"I'm Elijah," he says genially. "Please, have one. Rebekah will be right down."

"Thanks," Dan says, trying to keep his voice as level as possible - until he looks down at the platter Elijah's offering and nearly chokes on his own spit.

It's cocktail sausages, Dan thinks desperately, thin, curled ones - it must be, slathered in some deep red sauce to make it look like - like blood. Decorative. Shockingly realistic.

(But he still can't quite explain why they look like battered, bloodied, fingers.)

"Something the matter?" Elijah asks, and it occurs to Dan that under that calm demeanour lies a crazed madman.

At Elijah's raised eyebrow, Dan mutters a hurried 'no' and swipes one from the tray with his right hand (his left remains in his pocket, his fingernails embedded deep into the flesh of his palm) and bites down. It crunches.

Dan looks from Elijah (still staring down at him) to Kol (still with that smirk on his face) bewilderedly. "Is this—are these _real_?"

"Of course not, don't be daft." And the brother he can only assume to be Klaus appears, sauntering down the spiral staircase. He gives a smile that looks painfully fake (his teeth glint), but Dan doesn't care in his relief. He chews a bit more, then swallows, and Klaus continues:

"Do you know how long fingernails take to cook? And we only found out you were coming about thirty minutes ago." Klaus reaches the foot of the stairs, and his smile widens.

Dan looks at Klaus, his eyes widening in his dawning horror, with what appeared to be a _real human finger _pinched between his thumb and forefinger. A real human finger that he had bitten on, chewed, and _swallowed_.

"It's an acquired taste," Kol says snidely, "like our sister. Now are you doing to finish that or—" Kol doesn't get to finish his sentence, because he finds a fingernail smacked against his forehead and a door slamming in his face as Dan scampers the hell out of there.

Kol's eyes darken, Klaus runs a finger through the bloodstain on Kol's forehead and brings it to his mouth for a taste, and Elijah deposits the tray on a side table before asking, "Is it your turn to go after them, or mine?"

Klaus's answer is interrupted by Rebekah appearing at the top of the staircase, fingers working to fasten her earrings. "What was that? I heard the door—is Dan here yet?"

Her brothers blink up at her ("Dan? What kind of peasant name is that?" "Were you expecting someone? I was unaware, sister." "I need a drink.") and Rebekah frowns, tapping Dan's number into her phone.

He never picks up.

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Feel free to leave prompts! : )


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